Wednesday, February 26, 2014

The Doll's Christmas



This was one of my favorite books when I was a little girl. I would read it to my own sweet dolly and then secretly prepare for her Christmas. I would wash and press her very best dress, brush and style her hair and hang her tiny stocking. I would then set my heart to making her gifts; knit hair ribbons, sew lace to tiny doll socks, and hand illustrate a little "book"... She was such a good dolly, and always so happy with her Christmas.

Sometimes I wish I could be that little girl again. The sweet, simple delights of being a child. I wish I had known then that I would long for those days. I wish I hadn't been in such a hurry to grow up. I hope that I have finally learned to live fully in today and savor each moment. And, I hope someday to have a sweet granddaughter to share my love of dolls and books and fancy dresses and handcrafts and hair ribbons.... someday!

What do you remember of childhood holidays?





Friday, May 20, 2011

Take Me To your Leader!

I believe in UFOs! I have seen them! In fact, my craft studio is full of them.... UnFinished Objects, that is! (I know, you thought I was talking about flying saucers! But I haven't decided whether or not I believe in those UFOs...yet! Maybe we can talk about them later...)

For now, however, I am surrounded by projects that captured my imagination once and demanded that I begin, but somehow lost their charm or momentum. And here they are, vying once again for my attention; begging me to notice them or make them whole, and, in some cases, actually flirting to make me remember why I loved them in the first place!

Knitting projects...

Crochet projects...



Quilting projects, both large and small...



Some of these creations will come into being after all. I am in love again with their color or texture and I will finish. Some will take on a new life and become something I never even dreamed of when I started. But a few of these items no longer appeal to me. I've changed my mind about the colors. I no longer need a 'whatever-the-heck-that-was-going-to-be'. Or, maybe the person it was intended for is gone and it breaks my heart to look at it. The projects I will not complete will find new homes; I will contact my crafting friends and see if these little unclaimed orphans can come and be with them instead.

I think cleaning out my craft studio is like walking through my memories. I regather what is good, and useful and lovely. I set aside what I must keep, but can't quite cope with right now. And I learn to forget what is ugly and does me no good to hold onto. It is like forgiveness; forgiving myself for my bad taste or poor color choices. Accepting that I cannot succeed brilliantly at every task I set for myself, and letting it be okay that I "failed".

This time I will not chatise myself for procrastination, or waste of money, time, talent and closet space. This time I will let the UFOs bring me peace. This time I will look into the face of these 'things almost finished'  and I will boldy say, "Take me to your leader!"

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Thoughts On Politics and "News" Stories...

I try really hard not to preach at people! I think about so many things all the time, and I know that everybody has their own way of thinking about things, and truthfully, nothing frustrates me more than someone else trying to make up my mind for me before I have had a chance to think things through. That said, there are some thoughts that I feel I must share....
I think it is really narrow minded to blame all the trouble with our economy on the mentally ill, the homeless, illegal aliens and families who require public assistance. These people are the result of our nations skewed values, NOT the cause of all of our problems.

It is time to to place the blame for our economic difficulties squarely on the shoulders of those who have the power to affect change, yet refuse to do so because it cuts into profit margins. They outsource our jobs and then call us lazy when we cannot find work. It is time to to point our fingers at our government officials; those few elected BY us- to protect OUR interests, who somehow manage to forget where they came from and happily line their pocket books while they bankrupt our future and that of our children.

Although our social security has little to no chance of actually paying retirement benefits to our generation, our "public servants" continue to vote in pay raises, will be paid for life...even once they are out of office, and vote in legislation that benefit the companies that they own. They have ensured that THEY will in fact never be hungry, or homeless, or lacking in medical care when they are sick....AT OUR EXPENSE!

Our fame addled nation pays millions of dollars to people who play games and "make believe" and yet our teachers and childcare givers and nurses and longterm care-givers and the people who build and maintain our public buildings and roads don't make enough to buy their own homes, or pay for medical care, or send their children to college or retire at a reasonable age without fear of starvation.

We claim to be a nation of "family values", yet we criticize and marginalize any family that doesn't fit into our very narrow view of family; single parents, blended families, multi-ethnic families,  gay and lesbian parents, multi-generational households etc. We judge mothers who work outside the home as not being real mothers, yet mothers who stay at home are lazy. We think we have a right to determine how many children a family can have if they require public assistance of any kind, but any woman who dares to have an abortion is damned to the deepest pits of hell, regardless of the reasons (rape, incest, severely damaged fetus, disease). We claim to be pro-life, but we think it is okay to bomb clinics that may or may not offer abortions; as if the lives of the people in the clinic have less value than the unborn.

We claim to be a nation of religious freedom, but we are hateful to anyone who is not white, protestant and comfortably middleclass. We think that the Muslims, Jews, Catholics, Mormons, Pagans, Buddhists, Hindu, Atheists and Shamanistic Religions just haven't really heard the "good news" yet, and so, instead of religious tolerence, we try to beat them to death with whichever dogma we are personally enamored with at the moment.

I do not pretend to have all the answers. In fact, I have ALOT of questions. But I do know that it is time for ALL of us to close our mouths, open our eyes, lower our pointing fingers and see if we can't find real solutions to the problems that face us all. It is not as simple as shooting desperate people at our borders, or "making" all those "lazy people" on welfare get jobs, or making everyone believe in God the way we do.... it is going to take REAL work, REAL tolerence, and REAL talk. We need to stop worrying about birth certificates and pedigrees and "tea parties" and Liberal or Conservative and start to focus on the real issues at hand.

If we are to remain the "Greatest Nation" we have to pull our heads out of our asses and breath the fresh air of social change. We need to agree to disagree about the small stuff so that we can fix the glaring problems facing us, not only as a nation, but as part of a global community. We need to stop being the laughingstock of the world and take our rightful place as leaders of our planet.
Enough said! Lecture over! Soap-box put away..... for now!

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

When silly things make you happy....

It may sound silly, but I am so excited about my new cell phone! I am practically giddy and I haven't even activated it yet! I waited almost patiently for it to arrive, opened the box and now the delightful little piece of technology is charging next to me as I type.

Now, might I just add; coolest packaging EVER! Obviously this should be my phone! The cylinder that it arrived in is made of recycled materials and tied up with gross-grain ribbon in bright green! It's as if  "customer service" was spying on me to find out exactly how to present my new phone for maximum enjoyment. Plus the "case" that will clip to my purse and or pocket is lined in PLAID! Everything about it screams "Cute!" It has a good camera AND I can access fb and email from anywhere. I will be able to surf the web, listen to music and download some pretty cool apps!

I know, why so excited over a phone? It took me a while to figure this one out, but I finally have the answer! I don't ask for much! I shop second-hand, make for myself, use "hand-me-down technology" from my boys and spend the "real" money on them! This time I researched the phone options available to me. I compared prices and features and ratings. I read reviews. I REALLY did my homework! This is the exact phone I wanted! It isn't the fanciest model available, but it suits my personality and my communication needs, AND, because I waited for my "upgrade", I actually got a really good price!

So, laugh all you want, but my new phone is here and I am so excited that I can hardly wait for it to finish charging so that I can learn how to use it!

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Too-Enough

I have always disliked New Year's Resolutions. This time of year was a painful reminder of all the things I believed were "wrong" with me. I have always been "too"; too big, too loud, too opinionated, too wild, too different, too much, too... you get the idea! The list in my own mind was TOO long! Strangely, the problem was that I really felt that I wasn't "enough"; not thin enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough, not kind enough, not good enough, just not enough....

This year I am ready to embrace the dicotomy that is ME. I love that I still have things to learn! I accept that I am not exactly where I thought I would be at this age. I am pleased at how much I have already learned and am ready to dive into the future, accepting that I am exactly who I am and that is "Too-Enough".

My keywords for 2011 are:

"Simplicity"

"Acceptance"

"Creativity"

"Laughter"

and

"Joy"



I will be sharing the journey on this blog so that I can remind myself next year at this time that I have, in fact, been on a journey. So, buckle up 2011, we have places to go, things to do, and people to meet....




Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Ring Out Wild Bells....

Ring Out Wild Bells

Ring out wild bells to the wild sky,
The flying cloud, the frosty light:
The year is dying in the night;
Ring out, wild bells, and let him die.

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.

Ring out old shapes of foul disease,
Ring out the narrowing lust of gold;
Ring out the thousand wars of old,
Ring in the thousand years of peace.

Ring in the valiant man and free,
The larger heart, the kindlier hand;
Ring out the darkness of the land,
Ring in the [Light] that is to be.

Alfred, Lord Tennyson

This was one of my mother's favorite poems. She would yell it out in to the storms and wind of winter in those cold days between Christmas and New Year's Day. She loved the idea of new beginnings, fresh starts and spiritual "do-overs". I inherited this love from her....and now I am the wild woman in her bathrobe quoting poetry on the front lawn in gale force winds. What a legacy!

My birthday is tomorrow. I will be 41 years old. I don't know where the days have gone. My "babies" are young men. My dark hair is streaked with white. My left knee tells me when it is going to rain. Friends I have known and loved are gone from this world and I miss them. I no longer believe that I am immortal, but I know that I am not yet old. I guess I have reached my "Middle Ages". It is a difficult idea to accept, but it feels natural, so here I am. Ready to move forward; to keep what works and change what doesn't. Ready for a fresh start.

Ring out wild bells to the wild sky! I will be listening for the echo of your song as I step boldly into my new year. Ring out, happy bells, across the snow!



Saturday, September 25, 2010

When it rains.....

"When it rains, it pours" is a very old saying that has MANY meanings out here on the edge of the world.

Obviously, in a coastal climate at the southern tip of a temperate rain forest, there is the actual, physical RAIN! There is ALOT of rain! (It rains sideways, upside down, in swirls, and, my very favorite, up my skirt while I am trying to get to work!)

Then there is the "everything goes wonkely at the same time" kind of rain. For example, we need a new roof, the deck has dry rot, the fridge died, the dishwasher has started making the most alarming sound, and the microwave....well, you get the idea. Which leads me to wonder, why does everything go all wonkely at once? Is there some rule in life that states that everything MUST become an emergency? Wouldn't it be okay with the Universe if my household could "line up" to break down in a budget friendly manner?

I can see that meeting in my head! The house calls the meeting to order and the minutes are read. Then the roof says, "I am really feeling out of sorts. I move that I will need replacing by September."  and the deck seconds the motion, the house calls for a vote and the motion carries...

Now, before you call for medical intervention, I KNOW the house doesn't understand "Roberts Rules" and YES, there were signs that the roof was going. It's just the whole process of finding the amount of money needed at the time the money is needed. It is very frustrating to worry about money! In fact, I really dislike worrying about money! Money just shouldn't be that important!!! And it isn't, until I need money....

So, my nightly habit for shutting down the "Worries" so I can go to sleep is counting all our Blessings! We HAVE a roof, we HAVE beds, we HAVE appliances (for now), my children go to bed with food in their bellies, we are not cold, we are not threatened, we have education, and freedom and each other and...and...and...and...and...

And in the face of such an abundant list of BLESSINGS, I guess I have no problem with the rain after all. So, "Bring on the rain, I've a smile on my face!" It's all a matter of perspective!